Walking Unafraid

There is an R.E.M song that I have wanted to write about for ages. I have waited, because I’m not sure what it means; but it is singing in my head tonight.

It is about walking unafraid.

It is about stumbling, and picking yourself up, and being proud of your clumsiness.

It kind of captures how I felt earlier this evening when I was walking home after work.

Overwhelmingly glad. Overwhelmingly glad and suddenly brave.

Somewhere between the bus stop and my new flat, I stopped and realised that this was where I wanted to be, a few months ago. Right here. Even on cold days, and when the bus is late, and when I am so tired that I have to keep poking myself to stay away in the evening. Even when the City feels a little lonely, and totally unknown, and like it might swallow me up –

I wanted to be right here.

I wanted to live the London life for just a little while –

And so yes, I have been making a bit of a hash out of it; and things haven’t really gone to plan. And, okay, I’ve taken a few steps backwards and haven’t really found my balance…but that’s okay. I can deal with that. I can trip, fall, pick myself up and repeat the whole cycle again –

Because at least it’s real.

And at least I’m doing it, even though I’m afraid.

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5 Responses to “Walking Unafraid”

  1. James says:

    And you should be proud of yourself. In spite of the setbacks, obstacles, fears and stumbles you are doing it and you are determined.

    You put yourself out there, pushed beyond comfort zones and are living life – doing something that you set your heart and, thus, have achieved something.

    Hold on to these moments, Melissa, where you feel good, proud of yourself and in tune with what’s really positive and inspiring over the fears that would have you down and out. Fear needn’t stop us. :)

  2. Evan says:

    Congratulations, it is not easy trying out new ways of living. Especially when they haven’t always worked out in the past.

  3. Afterglow05 says:

    That is just awesome, Melissa! You know/knew what you needed to do to change your course – and you’re actively doing it. You chose this move because you knew you wanted it. I’m in awe – even though it wasn’t *perfect* and didn’t start quite as anticipated.

    Congrats Melissa! Thinking of you always!


  4. Hugs hun. I adore you and support you always. Keep walking through the fear. xx

  5. *hugs*

    Congratualtions a thousand times over.