Is an old cliché, but one that I have re-discovered in the past few days.
This week has felt better. Not perfect, but a marked improvement – and it’s because I’ve focused on doing it through the discomfort, rather than waiting for the feelings to go away.
I have learned the lesson before, but some lessons need a little re-iteration, particularly those that demand you to act on blind faith.
And so, I have fixed up a busy calendar and over-ridden the misplaced anger which comes from the subsequent obligation – and, within an hour or so, found that I’m having a brilliant time.
And, I have sat with the meals that I didn’t feel like eating and through the urge to remove the feeling – and slowly re-built the boundaries that, a few months ago, were keeping me safe.
It has not been easy.
It has meant that I have had to go back into pulling myself away from what was becoming an unhealthy form of normal; and there was a tension in the switch –
But each change reinforces the new direction, and each piece of practice takes a bit of the discomfort away.