You can’t beat a BT slogan: it is, most definitely, good to talk.

Being heard is equally important; being understood, a winning formula.

When you start putting things into words, you can deal with them.

When you start addressing difficult situations, you can talk through the confusion.

If you’re looking for a ‘get it off your chest’ space to say what you really think and feel – rather than what you should think and feel – then counselling’s great: but, a good counsellor is more than just a sympathetic ear; and, a good counselling section is as much about armchair detection and psychological sleuthing as it is about verbal venting.

If psychotherapy’s about interpretation, counselling’s about observations. Rather than analysing your life history, you’re getting the pieces together – and seeing where they fit. You’re dealing in facts – or, at least, your perception of the facts; exploring whether ‘a’ may have caused ‘b’ – or ‘c’ may have been encouraged by ‘d’ – or ‘e’ is similar to ‘f’ –

When you understand the chain, you can start to break the pattern.

It’s getting the links that’s complicates everything.

A good counsellor knows what to ask and how to ask it. They’re trained in button pushing– and then managing the reaction–

Sometimes you can’t put it into words unless someone else hits the trigger. Sometimes the answer’s buried so deep that, without shaking things up a little, you’re never going to reach it.

So, talking’s the starting point – but, if you really work with it, counselling helps you to talk from your heart – and not just from your head. It’s about getting you to be as honest and authentic as possible; because, when the barriers are down and the blockages unblocked, the answers are right there along with the problems –

It’s taken me a few counsellors to realise this.

It’s taken me a while to realise that you can’t buy the epiphany – you can just get some help on the journey. That if you really want to get your money’s worth, you’ve got to be prepared for a little discomfort – and a bit of hard work –

Sometimes you have to feel difficult feelings in order to break through them –

Sometimes, words lead to actions, and you’ve got to take change the behaviour if you want to change the story –

Sometimes, the truth is less pleasant than the misconception, and you can find yourself under the magnifying glass –

But you get out what you put in.

The great thing about counselling is it works for the small and the large alike – for the nice, clearly defined problems, and the times when life gets on top of you.

Quick fix, it’s probably not; but, when you start talking, you’re not on your own anymore. When there’s someone in there making sense of it with you – well, the insights could make a difference for years to come – and the changes will last a lifetime.

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One Response to “Counselling”

  1. Thank you for your help! Nice post with some well thought out points.